Discussion about this post

User's avatar
alissa's avatar

I adore everything you write! I really really related to the part about understanding my body as something that witnessed everything I’ve gone through. For a long time I very consciously split my body from my brain so I could have casual sex and “enjoy” it. It’s been almost a year since I’ve had sex and during that time I’ve been able to connect with my body and see it as my own. I’m entirely disinterested in casual sex right now (maybe it’ll change someday I’m still very young) and I’m really grateful the mundanity of my sexless life brought me there. It is sooo boring sometimes but has made me much more aware of what my body does for me and how I related to it which is completely worth it

Expand full comment
Sophia Mazzella's avatar

I really love this piece. What you write about pressure to have a “liberated” sexuality in response to conservative and religious constraints around sex really hit home. It took me a long time to look at celibacy as something that could be a positive personal choice but once I chose it without feeling like I was missing out on the way I was supposed to be spending my early 20s, it felt healthy and allowed me to heal from past experiences. I don't think you can sum it all up better than: "You don’t get validation from not sleeping with people. But maybe that’s the most rewarding part of it all, the sense of discipline, a unique reverence for one’s own body."

Expand full comment
11 more comments...

No posts